Underneath the covers is the phrase, large-writ, ‘which girl do you want for Christmas?’

I’m confused by this ad. I think it must be a cry for help from a damaged soul deep within an advertising agency.

If it’s not, then it’s clearly the outpouring of a deeply sociopathic individual, perhaps a deeply sociopathic industry. We should despise these people.

For, who in their right mind would decide to advertise this thriller trilogy like this? One of the main characters in the books, Blomkvist says: “When it comes down to it, this story is not primarily about spies and secret government agencies; it’s about violence against women, and the men who enable it.”

Who would take that trilogy and decide to advertise it as if it’s a titillating, sexist lad’s mag issue?

I don’t know. But they need help. Or failing that – after all, there’s only so much modern psychology can do – they should be sacked.

I don’t give a shit if they manage to increase Christmas sales, they should no longer have that account.

Fucking hell, we’re all cheapened by this advertising lark. When will it stop?

It’s like the music industry all over again – the publishing industry is run by people who hate books and authors, their stories and messengers. Long may they fail.

Christmas tree decoration seen in Canary Wharf shopping centre reads: CCTV in operation here.

This has to be a prank, right? There’s no way, even in the Orwellian Albtraum of Canary Wharf, that someone would have decided this an appropriate Christmas decoration for the shopping centre’s christmas trees.

Alas, I fear it’s real and intentional: what you see here is the red version of the sign on the red-lit trees. Similar colour-coordinated signs were on the blue trees too. In fact, this sign was on every damned Christmas tree in the whole of the damned centre.

It’s possibly the most obnoxious, awful thing I’ve ever seen come out of this obnoxious, awful managerial surveillance culture of ours. This defies parody. If it’s a prank, it’s an excellent one. But…

You know, I hate the polythene-thin sentiment of Christmas, in so many ways. But even I think we’re worse off if Christmas means goodwill to all men, and remember, we’re watching you people.